Curt Schilling is a Big Man

How do I know? I was nearly plowed down by him near the finish line. I might be exaggerating, but I did nearly bump into him right before I saw him walking, crouched over a bit to reach the hand of his tiny son. Then he got into the back of a police car. Hmmm... the kid must have done something terrible. Curt really is big, though. Luckily, he didn't rub his bloody sock on me. Wait, maybe that would have been lucky. Oh well, I'm already lucky. You should meet my friends. You'd feel lucky too. (If you're reading this, chances are you're already my friend, so thanks. You make me feel lucky.) Wow. Sappidy sap sap sap. It's cool. You like it.

Why is it that when I'm planning a trip to California the weather will be nearly identical in Boston? We only get so many sunny days here. I'm not sure I can handle missing any of them. Well, yes I can. Ok, back to packing and pretending like I'm not going to leave my place in a state of disarray. How can I do that while I'm sleeping? Ideas?